Whatever Rubs Your Buddha

Luke got some new shoes the other day…lime green Crocs. He loves them. He frequently wears them around the house with nothing else on but his diaper. When we first brought them home, he wore them all day and could intermittently be heard repeating as he looked lovingly down at them, “piddy coot” (that’s ‘pretty cute’ for those of you who don’t speak Luke). Though he is pretty cute in his new shoes, his choice of words got me thinking about the things we say (and the things oft echoed back by little ones).

Adults sometimes don’t realize just how much kiddos pick up. When we play the Wii, Luke will often shout out in frustration, “Shoot!” or “Dang it!” and though it is hilarious to hear, in the back of my head I know he only says those things because Chris and I have said them too commonly. I still remember from my childhood, my dad saying every time we pulled into the driveway, “Home again, home again, jiggity jig”. Yeah, I have no idea, but it has stuck with me. That and the moment my sweet and mostly proper Grandmother swore in disgust about my stepmother’s brief stint in our family. My mouth gaped open, but she never apologized for it and it still makes me snort to this day.

High school seemed to be the time when the weirdest phraseology would crop up. Words would circulate around for a few months and then go off and die in the graveyard of idiotic things people say. For a time I could spasmodically be heard uttering things like ‘Holy Moly!’ and ‘Whatever rubs your Buddha’. And, courtesy of my cousin Ashton and my long-time friend Jason respectively, ‘Go suck an elf’ and ‘Boo for you’ also made their rounds. Second-rate Spanish insults were a favorite too. If you can’t tell, we didn’t make it into the cool crowd.

Conversations would sometimes go like this:

Me (in mock disgust): Holy Moly! No me gusta tu cara! Es muy feo. (Holy Moly! I don’t like your face. It is very ugly.)

Ashton (smiling): Ah, go suck an elf.

Me: I’m just messin’ with ya cuz.

Ashton: Yeah, well, boo for you.

What can I say, we were Einsteins in the making. I’d like to think that my vocabulary has improved as of late, but sometimes I’ll still pay occasional homage to simpler times with a jiggity jig or some elf suckage. So what sort of phrases have you all sent to the grave? Or was I the only one with such an amazing capacity for awesomeness?

Blankies

Blankies. They're one of life's great comforts.

I had one when I was little and I hate to admit it....

(well actually, it doesn't bother me that much)

... but I even took it to college with me. Even uncomfortable glances from fellow students couldn't take me away from it. Unpopularity is a small price to pay for such succor and security as only a blankie can bring, I'll tell you that much.

That pink wonder was so beat up that every time I washed it I had to stuff the ragged batting back inside through one of the many patch jobs that had reopened. Sadly, it is no longer durable enough to even be held and it lies in a shrine upstairs in my attic along with some other childhood relics, now only revered from a healthy distance.

Luke has a blankie too. It is this blue blanket that he takes everywhere with him and he reminds me of Linus from Charlie Brown. He drags it all over the dirty ground and takes it with us when we go grocery shopping. I was never so careless with mine. He sleeps with it, he eats with it, he gets his diaper changed with it. I know I'll have to slowly shred it each time I wash it just so he doesn't end up taking it on business trips and the like.

Such an attachment could be genetic I'm afraid. The other day he even wanted to take it in to the tub with him when he was getting his bath.

I drew the line.

I was tired of washing it over and over again because he had to have it no matter what. (If you want to know how to feel like the worst parent ever...take a security blanket away from a two-year-old). He was reduced to an immediate fit of tears. I put it on the towel rack and assured him it would be there for him when he was clean and dry. He seemed resentful, but allowed me to hang it carefully on the rack and then began playing with his ducks. I watched for a few minutes to make sure he wouldn't try anything and then I went to put his dirty clothes in the laundry.

I'm sure you know the rest.





Yep, the all-powerful draw of the blankie was too much for him to handle and he HAD to have it in the tub with him. Hmm... this could be bigger than I thought.